Phase 2...

Many of us now possess suitcases with small wheels for ease of lugging them around airports and parking lots. Quite convenient, you’d agree? Under normal conditions, absolutely. Sheryl’s suitcase for her trip to Florida has them, too. However, her suitcase was so heavy and cumbersome; the only way I could get it to the car from the house was on a freakin’ heavy duty dolly!

Many weeks ago I volunteered to take Sheryl to the airport for her trip to visit her Mum in sunny Florida. Well, technically, I said I would drive her to her Mum’s condo in Toronto the day before. That way I would not need to leave the house at half-past some ungodly hour to get her to the airport in plenty of time – plenty of time to sit around for two hours drinking a five dollar Styrofoam cup of ersatz coffee and play any number of handheld games before anything remotely resembling pre-boarding occurred.

The weather for today’s drive, to put it mildly, sucked. Snow, blowing snow and my personal favorite, white outs! The drive was nerve-wracking, to say the least; I swear my knuckles actually burst through skin about 30 minutes into the 2-hour drive. Of course, the best is yet to come; I had to repeat this torture for the return trip!

Don’t misunderstand; I do love my wife and my mother-in-law. These driving conditions? Not so much.

There was however a pot of metaphorical gold at the end of my rainbow. We went to one of our favorite delis in the north end of the city for a late lunch. Our feast was beautifully marbled yet still borderline lean, suitably salty pastrami on double rye bread with hot, golden mustard and a crisp kosher dill pickle. OK, terrific French fries, too – but I didn’t eat them all! This delightful cholesterol-sodden meal almost made the drive worthwhile! Where we now live, there are no true delis. Sure, there are some places that call themselves “delis”, but not as we know them. They’ll serve a version of smoked meat, but not cured on the premises, hand-cut or hand-trimmed and piled impossibly high while served at just the right temperature… And now “Gagdonalds” and other chain restaurants (say it ain’t so, Timmie’s) are serving their own versions of “deli” sandwiches? Ha! Not even close. You can’t convince me that they even look appetizing never mind taste the way Switzer’s et al intended. I’m surprised that somewhere south of the Mason Dixon Line (or, in deference to our southern cousins, Macon) some litigious, fee-contingent lawyer has not decided to initiate a class action suit for false and misleading advertising.

However, I digress.

The packing is now done and relative sanity has been restored to our country household – at least until TLATO discovers her e-ticket is not quite where she thinks it is. Unless, of course, the intent was to leave it on top of a litter box for one of our five aforementioned cats.

So… Coffee, tea or me…ow??